Open… and closed
Hawaiian likes it rough.Or so my friends would tell you. And they would be right, at least when talking about my love of women that other people might find hard to look at. It’s not intentional, really, and there’s no reason to it, but I definitely like the girls who look a bit roughed up. Or who look like they could maybe rough me up. And the list is long.
I can’t deny that I get a strange feeling when I look at Lisa Marie Presley or Clea Duvall. I can be the willing captive of Traci Lords, Shannen Doherty and even Michelle Rodriguez if the price and hour are right. I have even been known to indulge in some Diana Krall or Fairuza Balk in a pinch, or to spend an hour alone with the cast of The Young and Restless just to get a fix. (For the record, I think their casting director suffers from the same affliction.)
And if I’m honest, it extends a bit beyond my love for the ladies. There have been phases when I’ve liked both Kerr Smith and Peyton Manning, for example, and there was a time not so long ago that I found myself inexplicably watching Inventing the Abbotts over and over again until I realized I was just doing it to be hit by the Joaquin Phoenix.
And yet, despite having plenty of options for indulging this strangest of vices, no one can satisfy this particular craving quite like…
Martina Hingis.
Her return to pro tennis this year has probably been the best late Christmas gift that I could ask for, and while she’s a bit more fit and muscular than she’s ever been, the facial expressions are still the same, and when she’s playing tennis, it’s really always best to approach those from the side.
I have been in an absurdly good mood lately, and I can only assume that all of the Hingis coverage during the Australian Open has been partly responsible. Hingis loves me, and because of this she sneered her way into the quarterfinals in her first trip back to big time tennis, and while I’m disappointed that she won’t be in the semi finals, I’m still grateful for the third set I got in last night’s match, which gave me a total of one hour and forty-two minutes of Hingis court time. For free. Now all Hingis and I have to do is wait for Wimbledon.
And since the Australian Open is over for Hingis for the year, it’s also over for me. I mean, I love women’s tennis, but I can’t put myself through matches involving Clisters and Henin-Hardenne.
Because at the end of the day, those two are just too hard to look at.
February 9th, 2006 at 4:38 pm
[...] Anyway, after leaving everyone alone with the Hingis, it was pointed out by a friend that I left many of my other favorites off of that list, and that perhaps others might “enjoy” getting an eyeful of some more women who can easily bring a tear to mine. So here they are, a handful of women who to, at times, make everything about TV hurt so good. [...]