Hawaiian Reeves

Today, Hawaiian has decided to share a bit of himself with you, his fans.

Since I can’t seem to get many of you to actually leave comments on here, I’m taking desperate measures… I’m posting a picture of myself. Thankfully, this is a self I have long since outgrown and barely recognize, but if this doesn’t get more than a total of two comments, I may give up and shut the blog down forever. Seriously, people, I know these are just my ramblings but they still take more time to write than they do to read, so in the words of the hopefully mortal Steve Harvey, show some love. And leave some comments. Also, phone calls explaining that you couldn’t comment because you read the postings on your smartphone or PDA will not be accepted. That’s really not the sort of PDA I’m looking for here. That’s right, people… I want is for you to reach out and touch me right here on the blog.
So it turns out that the guy threatening to excavate my mind has decided he doesn’t have the tools required for the dig. Last night, I got a long and oddly worded explanation of how really, anything that happened between us was bound to be too intense because of our personalities, and that he doesn’t have a “facility for my sense of humor” which was apparently too dark for him. I can’t believe anyone would ever think that I have a dark sense of humor.

This however, is the least of my problems on the romantic front. (more…)

Sometimes, Hawaiian turns off his television, and this is a decision he usually regrets.

And such was the case last weekend. While the rest of the country was enjoying a three day weekend, I was reminding myself that if you were to stick me in a crowd of gay men, one of these things is most certainly not like the others. I should have been smart and stuck to the Law and Order:CI marathon on USA. I could have played it safe and watched some sort of collection of shows about grilling on the FoodNetwork. Hell, I could fallen asleep outside and spent all of Monday night nursing a wicked sunburn, and that still would have been better than what I actually ended up doing to myself.

So just to give a bit of background, it’s probably wise to break down the gays for the rest of you a bit. To assign categories. To clear up some mystery. To let you all know that no matter how bad you think straight dating is, at least your bars aren’t segregated by criteria like body fat percentage, price of your jeans, and the presence or lack of chest hair. Needless to say, stepping into the wrong bar in the wrong bit of denim at the wrong point between waxings could be really traumatic for a gay man, which is why I tend to not go out at all.

Anyway, let’s take a look at some of the categories with broad strokes. It’s actually possible that you can cross over a couple of categories, but this is rare. It happens, though, and I’ll have to discuss this in a bit.

So, in alphabetical order…. (more…)